Who is more close to the child, the grandparents, the grandparents? Scientific sorting is here, don't believe it

time:2022-12-02 13:08:42source:monlittlebaby.com author:Common phenomenon
Who is more close to the child, the grandparents, the grandparents? Scientific sorting is here, don't believe it

Yuanyuan and her husband are both only children in the family. After Yuanyuan gave birth to her son, the old people on both sides were very active in trying to help with the baby, which made the young couple embarrassed. Yuanyuan naturally hopes that her own parents, that is, the children's grandparents, will come to bring the children, after all, she is closer to them. But Yuanyuan's parents-in-law are also very active in this matter, and her mother-in-law has taken good care of Yuanyuan as early as pregnancy, contributing money and effort. It can be said that the elderly on both sides have time and very much hope to help them take care of their children. Therefore, Yuanyuan and her husband are very embarrassed. They do not want to disappoint the elderly on either side. Nowadays, in many dual-career families, the elderly have become the "main force" of taking and walking their babies. There are elderly people pushing strollers and taking their children for walks everywhere in the community. Bringing a baby is not a labor-saving "errand". The elderly are not only responsible for the child's eating, drinking, sleeping, but also for the baby's knock, touch, and fall. Therefore, bringing a baby can be said to be a laborious and thankless task, but why is this task of huge responsibility, the elderly on both sides are scrambling to take it? Why do old people have a leisurely retirement life and have to bring children? In fact, this is not because the elderly do not want to seek comfort, but because they have a close relationship with the "cross-generational relatives" between the elderly and their children. Grandparents, grandparents and their grandchildren, grandchildren and granddaughters have a natural bond of family affection that is constantly cut. So, there is a question, I don’t know if you have thought about it, who is the closest to the child, grandparents, grandparents? Regarding this issue, some people may think that grandparents are the people who deserve to be closest to their children. Because according to the traditional idea of ​​inheriting the lineage, it is only natural for most children to have their father's surname and to be closer to their grandparents. But scientists may not agree with this order. As early as 1980, researchers from Toronto, Canada surveyed those families who lost their children and found that after the death of the child, among the elderly on both sides, the most saddened was the grandmother, followed by the grandmother, then the grandfather, and finally the grandfather. Based on this, Canadian researchers believe that in the natural close relationship with children, the order of intimacy should be grandma>grandmother>grandfather>grandfather. This ranking was also verified by American researchers in 2009. In a survey of 200 college students, Bissau and others from Luther College in the United States found that college students had the highest degree of love for their grandma and the highest frequency of interaction with grandma. Followed by grandma, grandpa, grandpa was ranked at the bottom again. For such a ranking, many people may find it difficult to accept, and even think that it has subverted their original cognition. After all, in traditional concepts, grandparents should be closer to children than grandparents. So, is this sort scientific at all? Is there a compelling reason? Why is the grandmother the closest to the child? There is a rationale behind the scientific ordering. Don’t believe that grandma and mother are closer. Generally speaking, mother’s efforts in parenting are far greater than that of father. Therefore, when the grandmother proposed to bring a baby, another consideration was to lighten her daughter's burden. Therefore, the love that grandma gave to bring the baby is actually double, not only the love for her own daughter, but also the love for her daughter and children. The child is sensitive. When he finds that his grandmother and his mother are closer, he will have a more natural sense of intimacy with his grandmother. And when grandma takes the baby, there are often conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Although grandma is meticulous to the child, the child is also affected by the relationship between grandma and mother, and the level of intimacy with grandma is not as high as that with grandma. In terms of biological relationship, I am more convinced that the reason why children think that grandma is the closest is actually also affected by biological evolution. The child is born in October of the mother's pregnancy, so the mother can be sure that the child is 100% her own. But it is different for my father. My father has not experienced the pain of pregnancy in October. Biologically, unless a paternity test is done, there is no way to be 100% sure that the child is his own. Affected by the biological uncertainty between father and son, fathers are less dedicated to caring for their children than mothers. In the same way, grandmothers take care of mothers and children as well. A grandmother can be 100% sure that her daughter was born to her. From a biological point of view, her daughter's child is also sure to be her own offspring, which is influenced by biological evolution. The relationship between them will be more intimate. There is a limerick poem from grandma who pays more for children, which describes the "status quo" of many families after having children: "Mother gave birth, grandma raised, grandfather Tiantian vegetable market. Grandpa and grandma come to appreciate it, and dad goes online when he gets home." The reason why I ranked my grandma at the top of the favorite list is inseparable from my grandma's hard work. In the elderly "walking baby army", the figure of the grandmother is often seen. Although the older generation often said, "A married daughter is like poured water." But when their daughters really need them, mothers will still be willing to give without hesitation. The reason why the child is close to the grandmother is because the grandmother paid a lot in the process of bringing the baby. Love is mutual, grandma gave 100% love to the child, and the child will love grandma even more. It is written in the end that there is a reason behind why the child is closest to his grandmother. Although it is said that there is such a scientific order, in fact, whether it is grandma, grandfather or grandfather, grandma is sincere to their children who are connected by blood. "Family and everything is prosperous", whether in a family, the grandparents take care of the baby or the grandparents take care of the baby, the young people should have a gratitude and more understanding for the contributions of the elderly. (The pictures in this article are all from the Internet, if there is any infringement, please contact to delete)
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