Adolescent children are difficult to communicate with, and parents may use the wrong method, using the "listening, listening, reading and writing" method

time:2022-12-09 author:Make one's mouth water
Adolescent children are difficult to communicate with, and parents may use the wrong method, using the "listening, listening, reading and writing" method

Many parents said that after their children entered junior high school, they were reluctant to communicate with their parents. Even if the parent follows the child and asks the child, it is ignorant, or directly responds to the parent's question with "It's okay, it's okay". Parents will feel that the distance between the child and themselves is getting farther and farther, the original harmonious parent-child relationship has disappeared, and the child and the parent have become particularly unfamiliar. According to a survey, 50% of Chinese parents said they could not communicate with their children smoothly. Children enter puberty and become rebellious. That is to say, children who used to be well-behaved and sensible have become very sensitive now, and they will not talk to their parents when they have something on their mind. I don't know about your kids, is that right? My cousin said that when her son was in the sixth grade of primary school, he would be very happy to hold hands with him when he crossed the road. When I entered junior high school, I suddenly hated my mother. The cousin and the baby were walking together as before, and they naturally took the child's hand. Unexpectedly, the son was very annoyed and shook off the old mother, and hurried forward alone. The cousin felt very lost at that moment, and the son became more and more reluctant to talk to the parents. Now that school is over, the child will hide in his room alone when he returns home. Only then did my cousin realize that the child's puberty is coming.

When children reach puberty, why are they reluctant to communicate with their parents?

This is also determined by the particularity of puberty. After children enter puberty, hormones in their bodies increase rapidly, and they begin to become more and more independent. This is a very important period in the growth of children. Adolescents are also somewhat contradictory. They want to get rid of their parents' control and get along well with their peers, but they are worried that they will not be able to face the outside world alone. If the parent treats the child in an authoritative role, the child will become increasingly rebellious. Many parents always feel that the baby is still small and everything is controlled. As they get older, children resist parental discipline with their behavior and words and deeds. Parents should respect their children and trust them. They should learn to make some changes so that they can communicate well with their children. They can use the method of "listening, listening, reading and writing". Listening: The so-called art of talking is the art of listening and being heard. Adolescent children want to be respected by their parents, and their sense of need becomes stronger and stronger. Mom and Dad still treat the baby as a child, and blindly instigating it will only increase the parent-child conflict. Carnegie said that if you want to be a good talker, then first be a complimented listener. If parents want to communicate with their children harmoniously, they must first listen carefully to their children. Only in this way can children be willing to open their hearts. Good listening is the most basic element of communication between parents and children. When parents communicate with their children, parents should listen wholeheartedly and show a strong interest in the words of their children. I want to ask the baby: What happened in the end of this matter? In this way, children feel that they are cared for and respected by their parents, and they are willing to continue to communicate with their parents. After listening to the child's confidence, parents actively give guidance and advice, so that the child can show respect and confidence in what the parents say. Listening and talking between parents and children become more and more harmonious, and communication will be more effective. Said: "A good word is warm in winter, but a bad word hurts in June." Parents always feel that they are adults, and the words they say are very important. The same sentence, said in different ways, has completely different effects. For young babies, if they encounter problems, they can explain them seriously, but for adolescent babies, parents should be gentle with their children. For example, the parent said to the child: "Your homework has not been finished yet." Or: "Son, all your homework has been completed." It must be the latter, which will make the child feel more useful. Parents teach by words and deeds, and talk to their children well, in order to play a guiding effect. Reading: Read your child's emotions and control your emotions. 70% of the communication between people depends on emotions, and 30% is the content. If the emotions are not right, the content will naturally be distorted. It is obvious that what the parents said is very reasonable, but when they are in a bad mood, the children will feel that the parents are blaming themselves. When communicating with children, parents should read their children's emotions and accept them in order to solve problems. Think more from the child's point of view, and then use a good mood to communicate with the child. Parents are in a bad mood, how can they educate their children? Communicate with your baby in a friendly way, treat each other as equals, and encourage more, so as to achieve the desired effect. Writing: Letter communication is also very important. Sometimes, the face-to-face communication between parents and children can easily lead to conflicts. Consider sitting down and writing a letter, which will make it easier for your child to accept. I remember when we were in school, we used letters to contact our friends. Expressing your feelings through words, the way of waiting for good news, will give children a greater sense of expectation. In many parent-teacher meetings, teachers will arrange for the children to write letters to their parents and the parents to reply to their children. This way of communication in letters has a strong ink smell, which is memorable. Conclusion: Adolescent children can make parents very anxious, and parents need to adjust their mentality and communication mode. Communicate with your child in the right way, so that the child can grow up positively and healthily. (The picture in this article comes from the Internet, if there is any infringement, please contact to delete it)
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