How to let children know that they are worthy of love? This is the best answer I've seen

time:2022-10-07 12:24:41source:monlittlebaby.com author:Baby bones
How to let children know that they are worthy of love? This is the best answer I've seen

I believe that many parents have such confusion when raising their children: "It is clear that they have devoted a lot of time and energy to their children, but the children do not appreciate it." "Obviously love children very much, but in the end they become strangers under the same roof." Why do we give all our love to children, but children are not as obedient, sensible, and loving as we imagined? ? This is because love is not about how much you give, but how much the other person receives. Colleague Xiao Li's 10-year-old child, he taught the child this way: eat breakfast on time, take it away directly after the time, and he will let the child bear the consequences of his lack of time concept. Toys should be put away in time after playing, and if they are not put away, they should be thrown into the trash can. He wants to let the child bear the consequences of not cleaning up. Learn to share, there are delicious and fun things to share with everyone. He always felt that doing this was his love for the child. It was not until later that he read a lot of parenting books and learned that the physical and psychological needs of children at each stage of growth were different. It may even make the child feel bad and unworthy of love. In fact, as a parent, instead of thinking about how to love your child all day, it is better to think about what kind of love your child needs. 1. Love with Perception Perception is a term in psychology, the ability to perceive and perceive. That is, the response of our senses to the outside world is called sensation. And multiple senses produce a kind of subjective cognition on the same thing, which is perception. Such as sitting in an air-conditioned room and eating iced watermelon in summer, we feel very cool. This "coolness" is our perception. We will start to think, why is the air-conditioned room cool and hot outside? Can we eat watermelon only in summer? Perception is the foundation of thinking. With perception, children will observe and think, and there will be collisions of thinking. Only when a child observes and thinks more, his thinking ability will be stronger and he will see things more clearly. For example, when eating, when parents put delicious food into their children's bowls, children with strong perception see their parents' full love for themselves, while children without perception may not see anything. Or take it for granted. The stronger a child's ability to perceive, the stronger his ability to feel love. Therefore, opening up perception is a prerequisite for children to feel loved. 2. Having consciousness Feeling consciousness is what we need to pay attention to. Feeling is our emotional experience. Conscious feeling is that we pay attention to different places and produce different emotional responses. For example, in daily life, parents praise their children when they see their progress, praise them for their advantages, and often express their appreciation and love to their children. oneself is loved. On the contrary, if parents often scold their children and hold on to their shortcomings, the children feel that they are bad, that they have embarrassed their parents, disappointed their parents, they cannot feel love, and they feel that they are not worthy of being loved. 3. Love with Satisfaction Satisfaction includes three aspects: material, emotional and spiritual. Material satisfaction is what the child wants, whether the parents will provide it for him. Of course, this does not mean that all the material needs of the child must be met, and that you can buy what you want, but that what should be satisfied must be satisfied according to the specific situation. Toys, etc., make children feel respected and loved by their parents. Emotional satisfaction is to accompany the child efficiently, enjoy the happy time with the child, and play happily together, instead of playing with the mobile phone while accompanying the child, and urging the child to hurry up, otherwise it will delay your affairs, let the child have guilt. Spiritual satisfaction is to take children to experience life, travel, see the world, get in touch with nature, observe, think, and communicate what they think and think while playing. Instead of letting the child die to study, not letting the child have his own ideas, the child will find it very troublesome to make mistakes. Therefore, parents love their children, not what you do or say, but what the children feel. How can parents help their children feel loved? In daily life, take children out to play more, feel the nature, observe the things around them, and express their feelings. Ask your children why? Ask your child questions often, and slowly help your child open up their perceptual abilities. Occasionally give children some small surprises, small gifts. Even if you are on a business trip, tell your child that you miss him very much. Cook some favorite dishes for your child and tell him they are made just for him. When you are with your child, put down your phone and accompany your whole heart to bring satisfaction to your child. Give your child a big hug before going to work every day, and say good night before going to bed. Manage your emotions, smile more, and tell your child that Mom and Dad will always love you no matter what. Love is actually very simple. I hope all parent-child relationships can go both ways.
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