Children's self-esteem germinates in this age group, and is often ignored by parents. 4 manifestations are obvious.

time:2023-02-03 author:Emergency treatment
Children's self-esteem germinates in this age group, and is often ignored by parents. 4 manifestations are obvious.

After dinner, I was walking around the community with my husband and met Xiao Ke's mother next door. While we were walking and chatting, Xiaoke’s mother talked about a thing she was very confused about recently and wanted us to help analyze it. "Xiao Ke is in kindergarten and middle class. Recently, I always say that I don't praise her. I didn't take it seriously at first, I thought it was the child's emotions." Xiao Ke's mother said, "But she always said that it made me feel bad. I don't know what to do." I asked, "Do you usually praise her?" Xiaoke's mother was stunned and said, "She is very good and excellent, and I often say she is good, but sometimes Will compare other children's children with her. No, before going downstairs just now, she said that I only know how to praise other children." Xiaoke's mother asked if our children were looking for trouble. I smiled and said, "The child is not looking for trouble, she really feels wronged. This is the expression of self-esteem." Whenever the word "self-esteem" is mentioned, we generally do not associate with kindergarten children, or even do not Young parents think that at a young age, how can they know what self-esteem is. In fact, self-esteem begins to germinate in early childhood, and it is crucial to the future development of children.

Children's self-esteem is formed at the age of 4-5

British educator Spencer pointed out: Every child's spiritual world needs to rely on Self-esteem to support. Self-esteem is a relatively abstract concept. Based on adults, how to define self-esteem is very vague. Xiaoke's mother said that she herself can't understand what self-esteem is, how can such a small child understand. It is true that children do not know that their awareness is a manifestation of self-esteem, but this does not affect the children already have this understanding. 1. The concept of self-esteem In the process of children's growth, self-cognition becomes more and more clear, and they begin to know how to evaluate their own qualities. The part of self-evaluation is called self-esteem. In simple terms, self-esteem is a part of the self, it's a feeling, how we see ourselves, and whether we like our performance. Whether self-esteem is valued directly affects children's behavior and mental health. 2. The timing of the formation of self-esteem in young children A study on children aged 4-5 shows that children have established a sense of self-esteem at the age of 4-5 (or even earlier). They found that young children at this age who formed secure attachments with their parents had the highest self-esteem scores, and also considered themselves more lovable and generally perceived by their teachers as more competent. Retested by age 8, the results were also stable. Psychologist Bowlby has also found in research that children who have established secure attachment since childhood have a more positive sense of self-worth and children are happier.

Children's self-esteem germination has four manifestations

Experimental studies have shown that within a certain range, the higher the child's self-esteem level, the better the performance in all aspects. When it comes to a child's self-esteem, I think I have some say. Because when my brother had these behaviors at the earliest, I also had a certain misunderstanding of the child's performance. At that time, I only felt that he suddenly became sensitive, always wanted to be praised, and would be sad for a long time if he was criticized a little. Later, after consulting a lot of parenting books, I realized that it is the performance of the child's self-esteem. Children's self-esteem germination usually has the following four manifestations, see if your baby has the same style. Expression 1: When a child is praised, he will show joy. When a child is praised and praised by a teacher, parent or child for a certain thing, or when he is praised for completing a thing independently, he will show embarrassed, proud and other expressions. Performance 2: Hope to get attention from others. For example, when a child completes a handicraft work, he will take the initiative to tell others that it is done independently by himself, expecting to be affirmed and praised. For Xiao Ke, she hopes to be noticed by her mother, to be praised and recognized by her mother, and then to gain self-esteem and satisfaction. But my mother always said that when others danced well and read English well, Xiao Ke was very frustrated. Performance 3: Feeling ashamed when criticized. When criticized by teachers or parents for doing something wrong, even if they are not directly named, children with high self-esteem will feel ashamed and guilty, and they will be immersed in low emotions. Children with low self-esteem do not respond much to criticism. Performance 4: When the child is misunderstood or laughed at, the emotional reaction is greater. When the child is treated unfairly, or when he does something and is laughed at by his friends, the child with high self-esteem will show that he can't accept it, and the reaction will be greater. When children show these manifestations, parents should pay attention and give understanding and cooperation in time to protect their children's self-esteem.

Protect children's self-esteem, try compliment education

A study in Japan shows that children who are often praised by their parents and those who are rarely praised by their parents are more likely to succeed. 5 times higher than the latter. In the face of children with strong self-esteem, parents need to have certain communication skills and eyes that are good at discovering the advantages of children. I believe many people are familiar with Fu Seoul's "exaggerated" education. In the program "Dear Little Desk", some children are obviously depressed, have estrangement with their parents, and encounter difficulties in homework. After Seoul appeared, none of this was a problem. She praised Xu Jingkai for being smart and demanding of herself, and praised Xie Yuxi for her beautiful writing and beautiful people. Fu Seoul is not complimenting indiscriminately. She always finds the advantages of the children at the first time and praises them sincerely. Children's self-esteem is built on the basis of self-awareness, so our praise should be based on facts, not praise for praise's sake. Correct praise can help children gain self-confidence and correctly recognize their own strengths. Children with high self-esteem are also vulnerable, because they are sensitive and observant, and may hurt them in an inadvertent moment. When a child has emotional problems because of a "little thing", parents should not think that the child is looking for trouble. Calm down and ask, find out why, and give them time to digest themselves. Then try to empathize with your child and understand what the child really wants. After parents have the opportunity to communicate with their children normally, they can guide their children how to digest bad emotions, so that while protecting their self-esteem, they can also teach their children how to strengthen their minds. A person's emotional stability, acceptance of failure, all belong to the category of self-esteem. Protecting children's self-esteem and giving the right praise is crucial to their future growth. Conclusion: There will be various problems on the way of children's growth, and psychological problems now require more and more attention and attention. Self-esteem is a part of self-growth. It guides children to correctly understand emotions, manage emotions, and recognize their growth and excellence, and believe that they will grow up healthy and happy. (The picture in this article comes from the Internet, if there is any infringement, please contact to delete it)
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