Children always like to do it against themselves? Learn to use "reverse thinking" to conquer "bear children"

time:2023-02-03 10:22:05source:monlittlebaby.com author:Diet
Children always like to do it against themselves? Learn to use "reverse thinking" to conquer "bear children"

Many parents suffer from the pain of their children "working against each other" in the process of educating their children. You tell him to go east and he goes west. You tell him to say 1 and he says 2. Sometimes it is clear that the parent is obviously right, and the consequences of the matter are obvious. However, children will still choose the opposite direction of their parents, which can not help but make parents feel overwhelmed, and it is more likely that children will be hurt and beaten, which will cause serious physical and mental problems to continue. How to use "reverse thinking" in the education of future generations is a very meaningful topic. "Reverse thinking", in short, means that normalized thinking changes and develops in the opposite direction, with a 180° deflection. Since normalized thinking has no effect or even a negative effect, then reverse thinking is more likely to produce effects or even positive effects continue to appear. . , Rebellious psychology everyone has it, just because of the individual differences between people, everyone's reaction degree and reaction method are very different. People always like to be maverick in a certain period to attract the attention of others. Of course, the same is true for children. If the child is particularly rebellious, then parents should ask themselves whether they have given their children enough attention and whether the child’s heart has received it. After I understand it, everything has a reason, and there is no unprovoked trouble that specifically comes to you, so it’s not scary when a problem occurs. What should parents do if their children are acting rebellious? The following is a brief analysis of the following points: One of the problems that modern parents are very easy to make when learning to listen is to be too "authoritarian", thinking that children should follow their parents' advice as a matter of course, or even an order, and children are not allowed to talk back and ask questions. It is easy for parents to regard their own opinions as whimsical children, and to judge the so-called irrational thinking of immature legal age from a mature perspective, which is inevitably biased. Sometimes, parents should sit with their children, calmly discuss opinions and differences with their children, learn to change the face when the talks were not going well before, and become a loyal audience for the children. On the one hand, the children will feel that the parents care about them. and treat them as an independent individual, instead of being ignored and treated coldly as accessories, which will have a rare favorable impression on their parents; on the other hand, after learning to listen, parents can collect more and more detailed information about the children, including their inner thoughts, recent trends, and the people they communicate with, and can even initially grasp the children's world outlook, outlook on life, and values, which not only wins the goodwill of the children , and also grasp the children's dynamics in real time, so why not do it? It is understood that the generation gap between parents and children can never be eliminated. Even so, narrowing the gap is theoretically and practically possible. After listening to the children's expressions, parents should try their best to respond positively, instead of saying what to do after listening. Parents need to use the "empathy" technique at this time. The so-called "empathy" here refers to looking at oneself, looking at problems, and looking at the whole world from the perspective of one's own child. After all, everyone grows from a baby to an elderly person. Even with different backgrounds and economic conditions, the most basic emotions and feelings of human beings are still the same. Parents were once young, crazy, and revolting against the family for a short time, so what modern parents need to do is to express their understanding of what their children think, that is, to "empathize with them", and to make it clear that they too were. Children, how did you deal with the family at first, and then you figured out what and how you figured it out. Although these have become intangible past for parents, but for children, it may be the most precious thing in their life. Fortune, maybe one day in the future they will recall the conversation they had with their parents, and they will be glad that their parents have understood and "empathized" with them, so the meaning of grace is extraordinary. Taking action is critical! Although many parents can also be faithful listeners and share some interesting stories from their youth with their children, some parents simply do the above two points, and then there is no in-depth performance. In this way, although the children know some facts and understand some truths, they may still be at a loss, which is far from acceptable for the children to accept their parents. Parents should not only speak big truths, but also lead by example and act personally, so that they can truly win the respect of their children. What you promise your child must be done. If you can't do it, you shouldn't promise it casually. Trust is always the best partner of harmony. For example, a pair of parents I know forced their children to sign up for a piano class. The children hated music, but the parents insisted that the children could only accept it. Rebellious psychology, which leads the child to want to have a good talk with the parents. After completing the above two points, parents should not continue to ask their children to take piano lessons, but should leave the right to choose to their children. This is a great respect for the children's independent personality, and it also gives children the opportunity to think about themselves. Whether you really don't like what you're currently doing. After a night of discussion between the parents and the child, the child said that he would think about it and did not immediately reject the parents. Parents use this strategy to successfully make their children enter the stage of thinking, rather than blindly confronting their children. Later, the child thought about it carefully. Although the piano class was not chosen by himself, there was still a pleasant part in the course of the class, and he also felt that the music itself was very beautiful, so the child made his own choice and continued to take the piano class. And later, he never expressed boredom, his communication with his parents improved a lot, and he became more and more independent. So having said that, parents must learn to let their children think for themselves, give them a certain right to choose, and truly implement their understanding and listening to their children. This is an effective behavioral communication model. All in all, if parents want to have good communication with their children, and want their children to get rid of their rebellious mentality, they need to learn to use "reverse thinking". The outcome of two cars driving at high speed is bound to be a loser for both parties. This is the best strategy. Learn to "reverse thinking", win the harmony of the family, and the healthy growth of future generations! Author: A working mother of two children who waits for the wind to come. She holds a pen in her left hand and carries her baby in the right. She likes to read, write, and draw. She firmly believes that even if life is a piece of chicken feathers, she still has her own longing poems and distances in her heart. Follow me and continue to give you Provide more parenting dry goods. (The picture comes from the Internet, if there is any infringement, please contact to delete it)
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